The Aquapons Lexicon.

[M Cosmo]

Aquapon: A human pawn manipulated by the Creatures of Aquaponics

DWC: Deep Water Culture: A cult of unspeakable icky creepy crawlers with some pretty things growing on top to hide them.

Raft Tank: A magic illusion of veggie plants floating in space.

Vertical growing: Plants on top of Plants on top of Plants on top of… you get it.

Grow Bed: The our of control mass of plants in a big wet mess of gravel

Tilapia: Creatures from another dimension that train humans to feed them and disguise themselves as helpless fish.

Swirl Tank: What you find your head in after drinking too much Aquaponics spiked Koolaid

Vermiponics: Worms you idiot. Just worms. Oh yeah worm poop in fish water.

PeePonics: A secret science developed by men to give then an excuse to pee in the tank since they aren't out fishing.

BeerPonics: What came before PeePonics. Also exclusive to Men.

FartPonics: Still under development. Lets just not go there.

PH: A great mystery.

Duck A Ponics: Bird pee and Poop when men or fish aren't around.

Solids filter: BVD underwear

Commercial Aquaponics: A cult of seduced Aquapons with too much money and no place to waste it.

Fish Feeders: Successfully Trained Aquapons

Black Soldier Fly Larva: A military sect of very small flying creatures.

Pump: Like a boat. A hole in water you keep throwing money in.

Free Gravel: One of holy grails of all Aquapons

Bell Siphon: A magic trick.

Plumbing: A bunch of small plastic holes you throw money in.

Newbie: Your last chance to get out while you can.

Novice: Too late you should have quite while you were a newbie.

[David Hart]

ACID a devil's brew, used in an attempt to manipulate the 'great mystery'...PH.
Not to be confused with, what the "Aquarian's of the 60's" used .... in order to 'explore' great mysteries.

[M Cosmo]

Contributed by my very patience wife
MizAquapon: Wife of Aquapon addict.

[M Cosmo]

Ok folks - Now buck up and add your definitions. The ones I missed. Thanks Silva. You have a great sense of humor. A requirement to be an Aquapon. Do as you wish with it.

[Sylvia Bernstein]

OMG, Michael...did you just write this? It is hilarious! I'd like to re-print it in my blog this week (with full credit to you, of course). OK by you?

I'd also like to add my geeked out contribution...
Ammonia - The evil force of darkness
Nitrite - Darth Vader, spawn of the evil ammonia, even worse than his life-force
Nitrate - Luke Skywalker, spawn of the even nitrite, but somehow born into goodness and light